Keep your eyes peeled for the Bravo channel’s new series “3001: A Sex Odyssey”… Casper & Phyco opened up the Independent Porn Review office for the cameras. We told it like it is… Reap it.
And remember - if you’re a television production company researcher looking for a self-elected authority to spout opinionated rhetoric in between light-hearted looks at the whacky world of fuck… drop us a line and book us for the gig…
Coming soon: “Casper & Phyco’s First Series”… until then…
DVD
Pretty Little Asians Vol. 1 [Hot Rod/Route XX Asian]
94 Minutes Starring Tomoko, Megumi, Junko, Haruka
Phyco:
Never has such division been apparant… Casper say’s “No” but Phyco say “Ah so…” to this slab of DVD magic from the new Hot Rod “Asian” line…
The Hot Rod mob have released 4 new channels of chomp: Asian, Platinum, Teen and Gonzo… lovely new branding, big video boxes, original graphics… you’ll see ‘em here as and when… but first up, these pretty little Japanese birds on the Asian firm…
What can I say? Well for a start its bona fide stuff… not just US studio setups with quarter-breed Indonesians passed off as the real thing - this is hundred percent nip, and it shows all the way through: sterile medical bed sets with zero frills and a very minimalist approach to aesthetics - white sheets, simple couch, white walls, stark lighting etc. which only serves to highlight the simply sublime nature of these delicate little creatures of the title… they are lovely let me tell you… all blinky innocent - and just a tad “vunerable”… nice an’orrible!
It’s quite a niche the Asian thing… if you’ve got a taste for the Orient you’ll know better than to swerve from the path - if slopes is what it takes - then slopes is what ye takes, for I challenge any other nation on earth to produce prettier porners…
They are gorgeous these girls… all white skin and shy giggles… an aura of shame at every position change… it’s back to basics on the menu: Boy/Girl sequences employing the old strip/strum/suck/fuck & cum routines to deliver an old school collection of standards, but you just wait until you see these dolls blowing the bugle… them facial expressions’ll have you in tatters…
Painful… although, try as I might - I couldn’t match that cover shot exactly with the action… robbed.
Casper [faux cheerfully]:
Phyco… talk to me about the sound…
Phyco:
Oh yeah! The DVD options also let’s you select from three audio styles… there’s “House” and there’s… “Classical”… and “New A
Casper:
FUCK the music! Where’s the sound?!!!!
Phyco:
Oh… have they deleted the mic channel?
Casper:
Too fucking right they have pal… how am I supposed to work with a product without sound??!!!
Phyco:
Well I love it
Casper:
Well you would wouldn’t you? You like all that cute shit… but how could you not notice the absence of the sound???
Phyco:
Sorry… I know what it means to you…
Casper:
It’s the most important thing for me is the sound…
Phyco:
I know… I know…
Casper:
Not a whelp not a whimper… not a creak nor a whisper… no smatch smatch smatch as the action unfolds… no clipped little breaths… no nothing… they’ve forgotten the fucking sound…
Later
Casper:
This chickens rubbery
Phyco:
Ahhh… fangyou sir…
Casper & Phyco - The Independent Porn Review
Looking at the world through wank tinted spectacles since 1988